Tuesday, June 27, 2006

popular science

This is Rhonda .

No, Rhonda, no one said bicylce basketcase. Possibly ever.

Rhonda's site rhondareleases.com

(make sure to fly the plane into her box, that's the best part)

Here is what Rhonda has to say:

Thank you for checking out this website. I hope you've enjoyed
samples of each song and each unique page that sometimes
contain (sic) surprises!


(Rhonda doesn't have a very firm grasp of grammar or Javascript...)

Here is what fans say about Rhonda:

Dearest Rhonda,
I just want to touch base with you so I can tell you, how truely amazing your music is. I mean c'mon, upon hearing "fairytale lost" I couldn't sleep for days. All I could do was be rowdy, and it even sparks creativity.

Couldn't sleep for days? Rowdy? I mean c’mon?

Here is a verse from that song:

My mirror image woo's in love
Gleaming at my style
Glamour Lingers in the air
The breeze can caress for a while


Let me know if that makes any sense to you.

Here is the letter I emailed to Rhonda:

Dearest Rhonda,

I have all your record’s. Bedtime story is my favourite. Do the order of the songs have any special meanings? Like how "Wear me Out" is followed by “One Finger Left” is followed by “Emergency Room”? Or is that just a funny coincidence?

Also, why on your webpage do you have a plane flying into you? Is that a political commentary? What are you trying to say? Is the plane supposed to crash into your chastity belt and open it? Are you like a sexy virginal twin towers? Is the plane your horny terrorist listeners? Does this make sense in a way I don't get? I am confused, but in a sexy way.

Please answer my questions when you can. I am curious.

Sincerely,
-Dave

Thank you to Jared for introducing me to this treasure. I will repost if she writes back.

2 comments:

morning_dave said...

Wow. Rhonda seriously wrote back to me within 5 minutes. She loves her fans, Rhonda does. Also, apparently, airplanes turn her on, she's writing a movie script (which seems to be a big secret...) and she may or may not consumate a princess bed, whatever that means...

Here is her response:

Dave,
You are hysterical. And I love your imagination. First of all, Bedtime Story CD doesn't have such deep meaning for sequence, but I love your analysis. The goal with the Chastity belt is to wait for my husband, make no more mistakes since I'm so re-virginated, and I don't want a disease that most people have; just like in my movie script For Good Of The People, except she....oops, can't tell you how it ends. Ironically, with BS ending w/ the song Bedtime Story, I don't have the answer of whether or not I'll wait to consumate the Princess Bed, a bed Only for matrimony even if I do screw up! It won't be on that bed! That's why I ranked that one last. To give in or not to give in....
Although it seems like I need that airplane to fly into me (now I'm really going to have some fantasies. I mean, what power from an airplane), it's just a symbol for part of my big dream, "Rhonda's BeachCliff Broadway and Resort". It's on this website. It also represents my dreams "taking off!"
Thanks for having all of my songs and writing.
With Love,
Rhonda


Come by the station and listen to "Country Breast". You will not be sorry.

Mark said...

holy shit that's incredible